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 Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!)

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Chaucer Lestrade
Renegade
Renegade
Chaucer Lestrade


Anzahl der Beiträge : 172
Anmeldedatum : 2013-07-17
Alter : 26
Ort : Surrey, England

Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!) Empty
PostSubject: Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!)   Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!) I_icon_minitimeWed Nov 06, 2013 10:13 pm

Name:
Jericho James "Rampant Desire" Octavius (Insists that women and friends refer to him as "RD")

Gender:
Male

Age:
34, although he claims to have been born on February 29th thus this may be inaccurate.

Race:
Human/Beastkin?

Appearance:
Spoiler:

As the head of Centre Head Tavern, the opulent Jericho often dresses in fancy and eye-catching garments. More often than not he sticks to a rather ragged get-up however, a large and tattered stetson hat resting upon his grimy, matted black hair at almost every occasion. In strange contrast his beard and side-burns are very finely cut, light stubble stretching to his chin to form a small goat-style beard. A tall yet painfully lanky man, Jericho wears an equally slobbish looking navy cowboy duster over a heavy brass chest-plate that covers his torso. Both of his wrists are shielded by equally armoured vambraces, as are his shoulders with a large set of of ornate pauldrons. His aforementioned bare left hand is strangely missing its ring finger, while his right is held in a black leather glove. To top all of this off, Jericho wears the sort of brown-leather cowboy boots you'd expect on the cowboy Billy the Kid himself. The only notable factor of his apparent beastkin heritage are the irises of his eyes, which often appear to be cat-like in their shape.

Loyalty:
NOL - During his early life Jericho worked as a lowly soldier within the NOL. Following numerous disputes with his commanding officer, he eventually deserted the Librarium and moved on to the underworld to find his fortune.
Vendetta Casinos - Jericho operated within the gambling business for around half a decade, working under a rather infamous mob member's rule to cheat rich customers out of their dosh. Jericho would eventually depart from Vendetta with a large amount of money pocketed under his foolish boss's eye.
Centre Head Tavern - Following his departure from the Vendetta family casino, Jericho used his loot and plunder to start his own business. While on the outside it appeared to be nothing more than a small scale pub with an even smaller scale gambling den attached, the "Centre Head" quickly became a hub for local vigilante wannabes and bounty hunters looking to find contracts. You're always sure to find men looking to do your work in the Centre Head, although you'll rarely find your purse in its rightful pocket.
Ikaruga? - While it is often spoken in hushed whispers, there are many rumours among the staff of the Centre Head that Rampant Desire ferries and trafficks Ikarugans for free, despite his high prices for most human trafficking.

Relations:
Jeannie May Octavius (Mother)
James Stradlater (Father)
"Reeves" (Business partner)
Ragna the Bloodedge (Attempts to assist his eluding of bounty hunters)

Personality:
Snarky, savvy and smug, in general Jericho is spurred on by a singular desire - the longing for wealth. While prone to actions some would deem as unsuitable for the situation, his eternal loyalty can be bought for a price or a favour. Having subscribed to the methods of the Vendetta mob family Jericho is highly protective of those he deems as partners or friends. While vocally he is anti-NOL, he holds a deep pocket of respect for those young officers that still follow the doctrine, as well as a great sense of pity for the consequences of their loyalty. He wears dark navy blues to represent his pride for what the Librarium once stood for in his eyes, the shadowy shade mimicking the black of funeral attire.
Externally he appears to be a rather charming fellow, maintaining a facade of charm to hide his true intentions with ease. While in truth there are many who he genuinely respects - particularly vigilantes and marked men on the run for extended periods (E.g: Ragna the Bloodedge, for his constant escapes have brought extensive wealth to the Centre Head), for the most part this is the only purpose it serves.

Weaponry:
Jericho knows that there are many out there who'd prefer to see him in a body bag rather than his hat and spurs, and with that in mind often wears an armoured chest-plate for protection from would-be assassins. He also keeps a couple of peculiar weapons on hand; peculiar in the fact that they're less of a weapon, and more of a set of reinforced glass playing cards. These cards have been tampered with using the latest in black arm technology swiped from the NOL, filling them with unique functions depending on the situation. Rather than following the four suits commonly seen with a deck of 52, the deck utilise their own four suits to represent use:

The Hound -
This suit is the most simple of Jericho's deck, representing the vicious and relentless assault of a hunting dog. These cards fly faster the lower their number between 1 and 10, with an Ace of the Hound easily being capable of slicing wrought iron smoothly whilst keeping its stunning velocity at the same rate. This suit also seems to possess some form of self awareness, being able to pursue targets logically and chain together for maximum efficiency. If Rampant Desire were to whistle, the cards would hurry to converge at his palm - loyal to their master 'til the end.
The Hill - This suit represents the activity of the earth and the motion of underground force. Rather than cutting and slashing like the suit of the Hound, the Hill instead exerts extreme pressure and force upon use. A Ten of the Hill could trip up an unsuspecting foe, while an Ace of the Hill could cause small landslides and form rock formations reaching up to two metres tall in the blink of an eye.
The Yeoman - This suit represents negotiation and diplomacy, although the cards are rarely used in such a manner. Upon contact with the card, the victim becomes dazed and susceptible to suggestion. This suit is different to the others due to the flimsiness of its material, making it extremely difficult to throw at a distance and often forcing direct application. While a Ten of the Yeoman can make someone easier to manipulate, only an Ace can possibly bring someone entirely under control. And even then, only the weakest mind could fall for that...
The Lady- This suit represents commitment and eternity, and in this case isn't as romantic as you'd infer. The cards of this suit can cause sudden bouts of rage in the victim, in some cases violent and in rarer cases sexual. An Ace of the Lady can cause permanent emotional damage to the subject, following a full minute of total anger and emotional outburst.
The Wicked Jesters - Two strange cards that apparently lay hidden within the deck. While they have never been drawn, they apparently possess a power considered too evil to utilise. If one were to try and lay out the full deck, this pair of cards would never be seen.

Abilities:
Jericho lacks the sort of magical abilities expected of his sort, but he makes up for it with a profound amount of luck and wit whilst drawing from his deck as well as a pretty decent throwing arm. He also seems to possess a slightly greater endurance than the average man, taking pain to a threshold many others would surrender to without protest.
He tends to rely on his own henchmen to deal with combat, but if he were to be forced into conflict he could easily go toe to toe with an NOL officer of lower ranks.

History:
Born to a prostitute mother in the lower districts of Kagutsuchi, Jericho James Octavius was raised in a poor and loud environment and had little interaction with his single parent. With no home of her own, Jericho's mother instead took residence in a run-down yet popular brothel on the main-road dubbed "Rampant Desire" by its broken fluorescent sign board. Those few times that Jericho was able to see his mother, she was usually with a paying customer raring for business to continue.
This tedious and dull life eventually came to a change when he reached the age of eleven, where his mother began to sell him off to enterprising men for nights as a personal catamite. Such horrors thankfully only lasted for three months, for one day his apparent father returned to find his favourite working girl for some quick drunken fun. Jericho's mother resisted, yet the drunkard insisted in the haze of his intoxication. It probably only took one hit to bring her down, but Jericho's father continued to swing and kick and claw at his mother's motionless body until finally soberness seized his mind.
Father left the bloodied corpse wordlessly, the long tail of a half-beastkin following in his wake. The young Jericho was left on his own, his mother silenced for eternity,
Jericho didn't feel particularly saddened by the demise of his mother, and took this as an opportunity to leave the brothel without his past holding him down. With nothing but the rags on his back, Jericho left the "Rampant Desire" and began to wander the streets as nothing more than a beggar. While it was embarrassing to make up different sob stories for every passerby, the sense of risk and independence was something that Jericho enjoyed tremendously. It was during one of his stories that he came across a man in the formal blue of the military - the colours of the NOL.
The man promised him glory and fulfillment in the NOL, as well as a pocket of gold larger than his torso. While skeptical of this man's origin and claims, the poverty stricken and hungry Jericho decided it would be an interesting course of action to take. He grabbed the man's outstretched arm without much reluctance, shaking it three times with the vigor of a birthday boy.
For the next few years Jericho's life only became duller and duller within the confines of the NOL. While he did at least attain the rank of a Corporal by his twenties, that didn't change that the doctrine of the Librarium said little about money and more about mindless loyalty. The man - who later turned out to be his commanding sergeant - was his only escape due to his obsession with illegal gambling, and it was from here that Jericho began to learn the way of the dice and deck.
He saw gambling more as a factual process than one of luck, and quickly he began to amass a large fortune for his sergeant with constant lucky bets in Pontoon and Roulette. It seemed like a perfect relationship for him, with his officer granting him a cut of the winnings and the two keeping the transactions under their hats.
Only his Sergeant didn't remain faithful, and within months he had cut down Jericho's share to a measly 10% of winnings. Insulted by the action, Jericho decided to practice what his people in the lower levels called "aggressive negotiations"; he promptly ambushed his Sergeant and mugged him of his money, before deserting the NOL faster than a cheetah on a humungous slingshot. With experience in the ways of the gambling world in one hand and a generous sack of dosh in his other, Jericho concluded that there was a future for him in the underworld. Logically he'd be a source of grief in the eyes of casino owners if he won all of their profits and slipped away, so rather than risk his skin to bounty hunters as a player he decided to instead come into the employ of local mobsters. He could press them for a share of profits in exchange for his knowledge and reliability in telling the destiny of every aspiring card player and dice disher.
The main mob group he came to work with was the Vendetta Casino, which sat in the richer districts of Kagustuchi so that all the big-shot businessmen and officers could come and stake their fortunes in drunken games of Blackjack. The Vendettas were a respectful and proud family, and it was here that his ring finger was cut off as a symbol of him giving up a life of love in exchange for a life of code and loyalty. With him giving so much to the cause, they certainly didn't expect it when after three years of respect and fixing games for them Jericho decided to make a runner with over a fourth of their bank accounts. Likewise, Jericho didn't expect it when they gave him a kiss on the cheek and never realised his incredibly risky action.
With enough money to buy him some man-power and some placards, Jericho finally began to realise his greatest dream. Under the guise of a new identity - "Rampant Desire" - he opened the Centre Head Tavern in the more busy and reasonable areas of Kagutsuchi, aiming to make business with the influx of bounty hunters and aspiring kid vigilantes that spread across the area like wildfire. Under the guise of a small time pub, the Centre Head would act as a business hotspot for a monopoly of contacts as well as a fine place for one to grab a beer and get knifed for speaking impolitely.
As the money finally began to run in consistently rather than in bursts, the newly dubbed Rampant Desire was able to reflect on his hectic life up the that point. Behind his shroud of business and content, he came to realise just how much the murder of his mother had shaped his path. It was less logical and more animalistic, but deep down in his blackened heart he felt a sense of remorse over her demise and rage directed at the source of it all: His absent father.
As his henchmen and workers pulled in more and more profit whilst dodging the watchful eyes of the NOL, Rampant Desire reached into the black arms market and dragged out a weapon that could help him achieve his new goal; a set of cards manipulated with dark technology that could turn any fight in his favour, whilst maintaining the symbolic and ironic appearance of an innocent game.
He'd find his father again one day, and then they'd settle the score over a bottle of brandy.
And a blade if it came to it.

RP samples:
"Listen right here son, because I'm about to get a tad bit grumpy." RD muttered, his hat tilted at a jaunty angle. His voice maintained a calm tone, but under that soothing drawl was a trigger ready to get the noose and lynch mob out to play. "And when I get grumpy, faces tend to be pummeled. Now I gave you an order, and if you don't quite follow it I'll just shuffle the deck and move on."

"Don't you just hate it when you get two jokers in a row?" RD chuckled, raising his hat and pulling out a lone playing card. "No one ever plays the jokers."

"Loyalty isn't earned dear, it's bought." RD informed, rising to his full height. He took two heavy steps forward before bringing his hands down onto her shoulders in a friendly gesture, his lips curling to reveal mismatched golden teeth. "Well, in most cases at least."

RD poured two shots for both him and his retiring cohort, who denied his offer politely. Shrugging it of with a smile RD tipped back his drink as his bouncers entered the scene, throwing the cohort to the floor and beating him senseless for his past betrayals. RD simply lounged in his desk chair as this happened, finishing his shot and downing the second without pause. "Why, this may come as a bit of a shock David, but I take betrayal rather seriously."

Tilting his stetson to shield himself from the being's mighty azure glow, RD made the sort of face you'd show when you were telling off a child for spilling sauce all over their father's new suit. "Now when you live in a world where everybody 'cept you's got super mega super powers, you just gotta make a few cheatin' moves."


Last edited by Chaucer Lestrade on Thu Mar 13, 2014 11:44 pm; edited 11 times in total
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Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!) Empty
PostSubject: Re: Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!)   Rampant Desire - The Left-Hand Man (Forever Awaiting Review!) I_icon_minitimeThu Nov 14, 2013 10:09 am

Bad news, I feel snippy today. Not that it matters so much.

Everything in this character feels pointless to me, even if it would be okay for CB antics, I have no interest in seeing such a character progress, especially since he got a universe of his own with no link at all to the overall storyline. I got shooed for it, and unless the character itself is crystal-clean and I want to see it progress, I have no reason to approve. And this character fills none of these criteria.

First, the personality section. A character solely motivated by wealth has no chance in hell to just make the cut into any relevant story. Seriously. Characters with such a shallow motivation (especially given the explanation), are usually to be demoted to comic relief useless characters. Which do not work here. Besides, a vocal anti-NOL is a vocal minority, soon to die or be attacked by vigilantes of all mettles.
The last sentence also implies that he has nigh-absolute control over the docks. Not only is that a bit overestimating yourself, it's also painting a giant target on your character, saying "Yo NOL douchebags, try and punish me." Here's the kicker: they would, and RD would die.

Then, loyalties. Due to how the NOL works, you'd think they would not keep track of some deserters, if he had disputes with an officer, he'd have been candidate for the local equivalent of court marshal. Which furthers my point on how he would just die quickly did the story make sense. And then he goes to some "Vendetta Casinos" thing? It's just an excuse to make a timeskip and make RD suddenly rich. Usually a mark of bad devising. Then, hiw own bar-gamblingplace-whatevs... It's not guys like these who put contracts and bounties or anything for vigilantes. Everyone (except you, it seems) knows the NOL is in charge of stuff like that.

Then, relationships. All useless since the characters mentioned don't even appear in the bio. Things like that are not to be mentioned, it just gives a feeling of fake padding of your character to make it look deeper. Emphasis on "look" since it's not the case: that doesn't really help since the relations are barely explained in contrast to the overly-flowery sections on each side of it.

And now, for the weaponry: Using cards in battle... It's a bit dumb. Cards tampered with technology thefted from the NOL, now, it's a whole new level of what-the-f*ck. Even the NOL doesn't fabricate Armagus en masse, so the technology to even make cards weapons by tempering them with magic or shit like that... not gonna happen. The homing slash-through-solid-iron Hound's description makes it overpowering and nigh-unstoppable. Again, not gonna happen. The landslide-causing Hill is overpowered, given what it requires for even GIGANTIC TAGER to make a one-foot-high crater (namely, Genesic Emerald Tager Buster), so you're getting into no-no levels of overpowered. The Yeoman... Mind-control? Seriously? Noone would utterly fall for that, but even then, the sheer possibility of someone like this guy owning a Jedi-mind-control-machine just freezes me there. The Lady, well... causing emotional damage is kind of a way-too-vague term, and besides, angering the foe to "total" levels would just be causing harm to him in the end. And the Wicked Jesters... we know it's the Jokers, but it implies that he has even more power than this? No. No. No. And NO.

Then, the history. Sure his life was sad. Living in some random prostitution-laden backstreet is not a life... but I don't even know if that's possible. Then his mother is beaten to death and he wanders, and lucks bring him to a NOL officer who offers glory, fulfillment and money?!? There are problems with that. One: NOL officers are all formed at the Military Academy. No exception. If you're not good enough, you can just try to be a vigilante, and that's for the better ones. Two: A greedy guy reaching officer level? Why the hell would such a guy pick up some random hobo?
Next part: their going on gambling sprees. This is stupid, especially when the other reduces your character's share and your character kills him in return. What. The. Actual. F*ck.
Then, he goes mobster and... how the f*ck does he have the ability to predict stuff? NO. "Telling the destiny reliably" shit is to be screwed. Then he joins the Vendettas and gives up one finger? What kind of rite-of-passage is THAT? Noo... That's just getting stupid, even the things he's taking are getting way over the edge where I can take this seriously.
Also, taking a quarter of the bank account of his contractors would mean that he's able to crack banks (NO.) or somehow hack into their informatics system or whatever replaces such a thing (NO.).
And now he's looking for his father to kill him... well that makes sense, but that's an old man now... you'd think that in a twentiful of years, that guy would've worked his oedipal issues out, but no...

Given the number of times I've written the word "no", my verdict is obvious.

APPROVALS: 00
DISAPPROVALS: 01
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